Domestic Dangers (Occasions of Sin in the Home)

I. A maidservant who yesterday yielded to solicitation, or who because of frailty is exposed to grave danger of yielding to it, is bound to seek another service; and, if for this purpose it is necessary, to warn her parents that she is exposed to danger. "These things, however," adds St. Alphonsus, "are to be understood if a person of this kind is frail and little devout; for if she were given to piety and cautious, and used suitable remedies for repelling temptations and for meeting passion, then I would not bind her to remove the occasion" (VI, 452). Likewise a maidservant must seek another service if the son of the household or a fellow servant is for her a proximate occasion of sinning, unless by warning the master or the son's parents she can put an end to the occasion and prefers to do so (St. Alphonsus, VI, 439). The master himself is bound, if it can be done without grave inconvenience - of which kind would be his wife's suspicion - to dismiss the maidservant under one pretext or another.

II. A young man for whom a brother lying in the same bed is an occasion of sinning is bound, if there is hope, to seek a change of bed, and, if for this purpose it is necessary, to warn his parents about his brother's wickedness. If a change of bed cannot be hoped for, he is nevertheless bound to warn his parents, unless the brother wholly desists from shameful acts.

There is question: 1° of a woman who is placed in danger on account of a male servant or another living in the same house; 2° of an adolescent who is placed in danger on account of a brother by whom he is shamefully touched while he lies in bed together with him; 3° of some other domestic dangers which parents are held to avert from children.

1455. - I. As to the woman concerning whom under 1°, let the confessor weigh whether separation is necessary for taking away the probability of danger, and, if it is necessary, whether the circumstances allow that it be exacted, by procuring namely that the male servant, or he who is for her the occasion of sinning in the house, be expelled. Hence the question can be made whether separation is to be judged morally possible if, in order to obtain it, it is necessary to reveal the matter either to the father or to the husband? I say that one general rule cannot be given in this matter. Ordinarily nevertheless a distinction is to be made between a girl who without grave inconvenience can reveal the matter to her mother (who afterward will manifest the matter itself to the father), and a wife who can have a just repugnance to manifesting it to her husband. The first indeed can fear no damage from her parents, who will have the greatest care of proceeding most cautiously, so that they may guard the honor of their own daughter; but the second can fear the imprudences of the husband, the calumnies of the servant, scandal of the family, publicity of the matter, and similar very grave evils.

But if the circumstances do not allow that the expulsion of the servant or of another familiar be procured, the confessor will have to exact the application of other means, and especially he will provide that the tempter not find her alone, especially in bed, or in remote places. The cure will be easy if the woman is not very prone to venery, and if she does not have affection toward the tempter; otherwise the cure will be most difficult. For the rest, the confessor will take counsel from the general rules, from the consideration of particular circumstances, and especially from divine light implored by fervent prayers.

1456. - II. The adolescent concerning whom under 2°, I suppose, cannot easily destroy the gravity of this danger so long as he sleeps with that lascivious brother; and I say: if, by warning the parents concerning this wicked action of the brother, he can hope for a change of bed, he will be held to employ this means; but if he cannot hope for this, on account of the extreme poverty or negligence of the parents, it can happen that either the confessor himself or the Pastor can and must provide for this scandal; and, if this hope is present, the penitent will have to be obliged to notify the confessor himself outside Confession, or the Pastor. But if neither this, nor any other way is available for obtaining a change of bed, nor can the adolescent without grave inconvenience to himself (which regularly is present) always or on most nights sleep on the ground or on a bare board, he is to be treated as one placed in a necessary occasion.

1457. - III. 1° Parents, and especially mothers, must be admonished concerning the most grave obligation which they have, of averting or removing from the house, as much as they can, all those things which redound to the scandal of the family, e.g. male servants or maidservants who could be dangerous to the virtue of their children (see n. 447. 2°); books or newspapers harmful to morals or religion; scandalous pictures or sculptures; nakednesses of sons or daughters, etc.

2° As to parents who allow children to sleep with themselves in the same bed or room, or with others of diverse sex in the same bed, see n. 432. 5°.

1458. - I say I. On account of the dangers which are accustomed to accompany service, especially today, a girl who is not driven to it by necessity should by no means seek service, especially if she lacks singular piety and prudence, except nevertheless in the case in which an occasion is offered to her of entering service there where from certain information she has known that no danger is present.

I say II. But if a girl already exercising service is subjected to temptations, and is exposed to a danger either proximate, or now indeed remote but shortly going to be proximate (see n. 1432), she will have to be treated as constituted in a present proximate occasion, and that either voluntary or necessary, according as the service will be able to be deserted with or without grave difficulty. - But if the occasion were necessary, the special remedies will be nearly these: 1° To threaten the male servant, or son, or master tempting her that the matter will be reported to the father, mother, master, wife. 2° If threats are made in vain, or are foreseen to have to be made in vain, to warn the mistress either by herself or through her mother, if thence it is lawful to hope for an efficacious remedy.

1459. - Query. If the tempter is the master, is the maidservant held to warn his wife, although she foresees that from this discord will follow between her and the husband?

Resp. "I judge," says Berardi, "that a maidservant, if she can easily procure for herself another service immune from a similar danger, certainly is held rather to choose this means. But if it is not expedient for her to desert that service, then ordinarily she ought, either by herself or through her own mother, to warn the mistress, if she hopes for fruit (and ordinarily fruit can be hoped for), although she sees that the aforesaid discord will follow. The reason is that, for the most part, discord of this kind is not accustomed to be of such moment that it outweighs the evils arising from this shameful love of the master toward the maidservant. Add that this love cannot for long remain unknown to the wife; whence the discord would not be avoided by the silence of the maidservant."

Concerning the maidservant who is impeded from hearing Mass of precept, or from observing abstinence, recall the things said n. 408. 11°, and n. 573. 6°. - The same is valid concerning a male servant, as is clear of itself.