Chapter X: Continuation

BUT sometimes one gets up, as they say, wrong foot foremost — that is, one feels so out of sorts, so cross and ill-natured, that one hardly knows what to do with one’s self. At such times everything looks dark, and is likely to go wrong; and many a poor girl who has not the habit of turning to God in prayer is turned all that day to evil, to passion, to dark and melancholy and wicked thoughts. Many a one has lost a good place by simply giving way to such feelings.

It is on such occasions, and they will happen to every one sometimes, that we see the power and loveliness of the habit of offering one’s self with fervor to God in the morning. As soon as this dark and melancholy humor comes over one this offering changes it all into a sweet and calm resignation to the holy will of God.

The dreariness of the world inspires a longing for God and heaven, and all that would foster sin.and evil habits of passion now only draws and unites one more closely to God, according to Holy Scripture: “All things work together for good to those who love the Lord” (Rom. viii. 28).

Then never mind how you feel in the morning; if you are out of sorts, if you feel ill-humored and cross, if you feel even wicked and inclined to evil, if praying is burdensome to you — go right on, all the same; cast yourself on God your Saviour; tell Him that at least you desire to be good; that you will not give way to these evil feelings, that you cannot help them; but you wish to be always mild, and good, and gentle, and ask the grace that you may go on and do your duty, and imitate your Lord the same as if you felt ever so devout.

I cannot tell you how much you gain by such a course. These are the very times when we triumph over the devil, when we are dearest to God, advance the most in virtue, and go farthest in fixing the soul, so that it cannot be moved, in all that is good. Then, on no account, though your occupation may give you little time, omit this offering of yourself to God in the morning, and unite yourself to Him with fervor and with your whole soul.

All this is not so easy at first because you are not accustomed to it, but it will soon become easy, and you will get so used to it and so fond of it that you would as soon lose your breakfast as to omit it. If called away suddenly from your prayers, your heart would continue to speak to God, though your hands and feet were occupied with something else, and you would perhaps pray with more fervor than if you had plenty of time at your own disposal.