ARTICLE I: On the Duties of Children Toward Parents

By reason of the threefold respect which parents have toward children, children are held to exhibit to parents duties of a threefold genus, which are declared in the following principles.

One and the same piety imposes filial love, reverence, and obedience. Nevertheless he who offends against these three commits a sin diverse in species. Thus, for example, he who in the presence of his parents, from hatred, curses them, has two sins diverse in species, one against love, the other against due reverence.

694. Principles. I. By reason of origin, children are held to exhibit love to parents, even from piety. This is established from natural right, by which gratitude is especially commanded, on account of the greatest benefit of existence and education received from parents. Moreover gratitude necessarily wishes good to parents, which is the same as to love. That love toward parents must be both internal, by which children from the soul wish them well and desire goods for them, and external, by which, according to their powers, they avert evils from them, attest their benevolence to them, and kindly come to their aid when they are constituted in necessity.

Piety through itself urges more strictly; because it imposes obligation not from a common title, but from a special and personal title; and thus a fault which is light if it is committed toward strangers can be grave if directed against parents, because perhaps it will be the occasion of greater sorrow.

Hence: 1. Children sin gravely, both against charity and against the love of piety, who, deliberately and in notable matter, are borne toward parents with ill will, indignation, hatred; - who exhibit signs of hatred toward them, treat them harshly; who look at them with grim eyes, and address them so bitterly as if they hated them; who provoke them to grave indignation, and gravely sadden them; - who wish evil to them, for example death, so that thus they may more quickly obtain possession of their inheritance; who in a notable matter speak evil of them, or calumniate them; who by evil arts impede them from making a testament, or, having already entered into their inheritance, do not execute their last will.

2. Similarly they sin gravely, at least against the love of piety, who do not furnish food to them when reduced to want; - who do not visit them when worn out by disease, old age, or sorrow, and leave them without consolation; - who do not succor them when they are in spiritual necessity, for example by not taking care that, when dangerously sick, they receive the sacraments of the dying; - who dissemble, as if they did not know them; - who, when they have already departed this life, neglect that the funeral rites and suffrages of the Church be paid, in a manner congruous to their condition (III, 333; Instr. catech., P. I, c. 4, n. 1).

Note. In most regions, civil laws agreeing with natural right drive children to this, that they supply FOOD to father and mother, and to other ascendants who are in necessity, that is, food, clothing, and habitation. And indeed this obligation binds children in solidum. In a similar way, son-in-law and daughter-in-law are held to feed father-in-law and mother-in-law. Nevertheless the obligation ceases when the mother-in-law enters a new marriage; likewise it ceases when there die both the spouse who had induced the affinity and the children of this spouse, procreated from the marriage which had been the cause of the affinity.¹

As regards children who would wish to enter Religion, see n. 2137.

695. II. By reason of the personal dignity of parents, children are held to exhibit to them reverence and honor: reverence, so that they acknowledge their dignity, and thence conceive, as they say, reverential fear; honor, so that externally by words, signs, and deeds they profess their preeminence. This is established from Sacred Scripture saying (Deuter., 27, 16): Cursed is he who does not honor his father and mother; and elsewhere (Eccli., 3, 9): In deed and speech, and all patience, honor thy father. Reason supports it: for where there is a special dignity of a person, there special observance is owed.

Hence, children sin gravely, of themselves, against reverence:

1. By an internal act, if they contemn parents in the heart.

2. By word, if in the presence of parents they cast curses or insults against them, calling them, for example, mad, drunk, beasts, thieves, poisoners, wicked. But if they call them "old, ignorant, stupid, etc.," they are not absolutely to be condemned of mortal sin, unless they gravely sadden them thereby. Likewise, "if a son should mock a parent, or utter evil prayers against him, without a depraved mind and secretly, I would not know," says St. Alphonsus, "how to condemn him of mortal sin" (H. Ap., VII, 2).

3. By sign, if they contemn them by laughter, derision, gesture. Likewise, if when advanced to dignities or made rich, from pride they either despise or neglect them, or refuse to know them, or even, which not rarely happens, blush because of them. Nevertheless a son is excused from mortal sin who, on account of a just cause and without internal contempt, pretends that he does not know them, or refuses to have them at his house, for example because they are marked by an infamous crime, or because he himself would suffer grave harm therefrom; provided he furnishes necessary things to them. And the reason is that in such a case the parents themselves are not judged to be gravely or reasonably unwilling (III, 334).

4. By deed, if deliberately and with sufficient advertence they strike them, even lightly; indeed if they only raise a hand, or seize an instrument for striking. Likewise, if in court they accuse them of a crime, though true; for nature itself shrinks from this. - Except the case of heresy, treason, or conspiracy against the prince, if there is no other mode of correcting: for the common good must be preferred to private good (cf. n. 2308). It is also licit for children in court to seek goods owed to them by strict right, which parents unjustly deny to restore.

696. III. By reason of authority, children are held to furnish obedience to parents in all licit things, and in things pertaining to their care, as long as they remain under their power. For children, being born in domestic society, are by this very fact members of the same society, for directing which toward the common good paternal power presides. Sacred Scripture agrees, saying (Ephes., 6, 1): Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is just.

We have said 1. In all licit things; for as parents cannot command the things which are forbidden by God, so neither can children obey them when they command forbidden things, according to what was said n. 692.

2. In things pertaining to the care of parents, namely to the governance of the house, to good morals, to the salvation of the soul. For in these things parents have not only the right, but also the office of commanding.

Otherwise, if it is a question of choosing a state of life, of preserving virginity, and similar things, in which pubescent children are of their own judgment, as will be said in its own place (n. 1951, 1; n. 2137, 2). Meanwhile it should be noted that children are held to seek the counsel of parents if there is question of entering marriage; nevertheless there is not given to them a necessity under grave obligation of following the counsels given. If it is a question of a priestly or religious vocation, the whole business must be brought to its end before God, with the confessor and competent authority helping. But what must be done if parents compel one to enter marriage, see n. 700.

3. As long as they remain under their power; for the power of the father is not perpetual, as perpetual is his right to the love and reverence of offspring. This power ceases when the office of education of the offspring or of domestic governance ceases, for example when children begin to have a hearth separate from the father (cf. n. 698).

697. • From what has been said you will gather: Children sin gravely against obedience, namely by a special sin, and therefore one to be declared in confession, if they refuse to obey parents seriously commanding: 1. In a grave and just matter which regards good morals, for example if children frequent taverns, theaters, and other dangerous places, if they play harmful games; if daughters go out of the house at night, if with suitors, or even with other youths, witnesses being removed, they converse (III, 335; H. Ap., VII, 3).

2. In a grave and just matter which regards the salvation of the soul, for example if against the formal precept of parents they neglect to satisfy the duties which religion imposes; if they neglect to assist at Mass and other pious functions; if for a notable time they abstain from the reception of the sacraments, etc.

3. In a grave and just matter which regards the governance of the house, for example if they refuse to furnish work formally imposed, of great moment certainly; if, because of sloth, they neglect to devote themselves to the study of letters, or to learn an art which befits their condition; if without grave cause they flee from the paternal house. But otherwise, if flight happens on account of a grave cause, for example because in the paternal house there is for them a proximate occasion of sinning which they would not find elsewhere, or because they are treated too harshly, and there is no hope that a change of things will soon follow. - In practice, nevertheless, not rarely the disobedience of children, even in a grave matter, is excused from mortal sin, both because of levity of mind and inadvertence, and more often because of defect of a rigorous precept (cf. n. 325, q. 2 and n. 692).

Note. a) What matter is to be judged grave must be defined by prudent judgment: generally it will be that by whose omission parents, domestic order, or the temporal or spiritual good of children would suffer grave detriment. In these also observe that one act of rebellion less easily constitutes a mortal sin.

b) Let the confessor take care that, in questioning children concerning their threefold obligation toward parents, he not proceed inconsiderately. For often, only incidentally and obscurely, they accuse themselves concerning their manner of acting, although it is very bad; and hence it happens that easily, and without fruit of amendment, they obtain the benefit of absolution. Therefore, their character and their education having been known, they must be asked whether they have gravely harmed father or mother by words, what they did, and with what plan; for there must be attended to the effect of exasperation, sadness, etc., caused in the parent without just motive, and at least confusedly foreseen by the child.

698. • PATERNAL POWER is the right which by force of laws belongs to the father, and subordinately to the mother, over their offspring and over the goods of the offspring. 1. As regards the persons of children, the law everywhere in force imposes on parents the obligation of furnishing food and education according to the condition of fortune and status. It confers the right of custody, whether in the paternal home or in a house of education, and the right of moderate correction. - 2. As regards goods, there will be discussion in the treatise on justice (n. 858). This power indeed arises from the very right of nature; but it belongs to civil law to determine how far this power extends itself, as regards public effects, and when and how it is extinguished. - When parents are lacking, paternal power is conferred on a guardian, beside whom stands a family council under the vigilance of a judge.

Children are distinguished as legitimate or illegitimate. Illegitimate children, that is, those born outside legitimate marriage, are either spurious, that is, incestuous, adulterine, sacrilegious, that is, procreated from parents between whom, at the time when they were conceived and born, by reason of consanguinity, or bond, or solemn vow, marriage could not be contracted; or natural, that is, born from parents who at the time of conception were indeed not joined in marriage, but capable of contracting it.

Natural children can be recognized, in which case they enjoy the rights determined by law; or they can even be legitimated by subsequent marriage, and then they are equated with legitimate children, and the Church herself admits legitimation of this kind (cf. Ferraris, v. Son). Let each person see under what conditions the law grants such legitimation (French Code, 331; German, 1732; Austrian, 160-162). Spurious offspring ordinarily cannot be legitimated before civil law. But the supreme power in the Church can grant such legitimation. See n. 1962.

In FRANCE (art. 371-515) paternal power, which belongs to the father, and, he being dead, absent, or interdicted, to the mother, lasts until the majority or emancipation of the child. Moreover, a son, likewise a daughter, obtains majority as soon as he has completed the 21st year. Emancipation happens by the law itself through marriage; it can also be granted by the father, or, the father being lacking, by the mother after the 15th year has been completed; or, both parents having died, by the family council, but after the 18th year has been completed. The emancipated person has the right of directing his own person and administering all his goods, a curator nevertheless assisting. But as regards marriage, a son before the 25th year completed, and a daughter before the 21st year completed, cannot contract it without the consent of parents; if the parents disagree among themselves, the consent of the father suffices.

In SPAIN, paternal power ceases: 1. by privation: a) if a widowed mother enters a second marriage, unless the husband, by testament, established the contrary as regards those not emancipated; but the mother, if she again becomes a widow, recovers it; b) if father or mother by sentence of a judge are declared incapable because of crime or divorce; but the lost power is restored when the effect of the sentence ceases; c) or if the child, the parents consenting, is adopted by another (Spanish Code, 168-177);

2. by emancipation; and this is a) absolute, by majority, which son and daughter obtain after the 23rd year has been completed. Nevertheless a daughter, even if of majority age, cannot desert the paternal house before the 25th year has been completed, unless for contracting marriage, or father or mother have entered second marriages; - b) relative, alpha) by the marriage of a minor, within the limits of the law (315), beta) by concession of the father, or, he being lacking, of the mother, but not before the 18th year has been completed, gamma) by concession of the family council to orphans of father and mother, but not before the 18th year has been completed, and with the judge of first instance approving. Emancipated persons can direct their own person and administer their goods. But as regards marriage they do not obtain independence in every way. Minors cannot contract without the consent of father or guardian; the father being lacking, without the consent of the mother, in whose default grandfather and family council successively furnish permission. Likewise those of majority age cannot marry without counsel sought from father or mother; but if these disagree, they can contract after three months.

Both request and consent must be established from an authentic document of a notary or judge. A marriage contracted without the counsel or consent of the father is valid; but the goods of the contracting parties will remain separate, nor can the spouses make donations to one another or receive them mutually, nor can a minor administer goods, and he has a right only to food. Spanish Code, 45, 47, 50. Widowers and widows, even minors, do not need the aforesaid license or counsel (ibid.).

In ITALY, the laws are nearly the same as in France. Yet a son can never be emancipated before the completed 18th year (art. 220 seq. and 311).

In AUSTRIA, sons and daughters are ordinarily of majority age and of their own right after the completed 24th year, but extraordinarily even before then, if the father, with the judge approving, expressly emancipates the children, or when the 20th year has been completed permits separate industry (a. 172 seqq.). Indeed, at the insistence of the father, paternal power can, from just causes, be prolonged beyond the 24th year. Besides, a minor daughter delivered in marriage, if the husband dies, returns under paternal power (art. 172-178).

In ENGLAND, the mother has the right of custody over children not yet seven years old; then the father, until they have completed the 21st year: at which age sons and daughters become of majority age and of their own right (Crolly, de Just., n. 466, 469).

In GERMANY, sons and daughters are of majority age after the completed 21st year. When the 18th year has been completed they can be emancipated by sentence of the guardianship tribunal, provided the minor himself and his parents, unless care of the children has been taken away from them, furnish consent. It is not licit for a minor, whether son or daughter, even after emancipation, to enter marriage without the consent either of the father, if he is legitimate, or of the mother, if he is illegitimate, or of the adopter, if he has been adopted (Civil Code, § 2 seq., § 1305 seq.). - As regards religious education, especially of those who arise from a mixed marriage, the whole matter is committed to the law of the particular States. Holy Mother Church is deservedly saddened by these things, because in many respects her rights are harmed. Let these be consulted: Dr. Geiger, Die religiose Erziehung der Kinder; Karl Schmidt, Konfession der Kinder; Lehmkuhl, Das burgerliche Gesetzbuch, where there are many very useful things.